-Another peaceful night.
-Normal bladder movements
-Had a coffee for taste.
-No nap needed.
-No period yet, but last time I cleansed, I got if after two weeks – so much for down time! No -expectations, just going with the flow.
-When I “feel” hungry, I hop onto Pinterest and eat with my eyes, you’d be surprised how well that works, and if not, EFT helps. 🙂
Was out and about today, and for the most part with normal energy levels. During the last cleanse, I didn’t go out much, but this time around, I feel it’s doable (not every single day, but doable). Needless to say, it was quite inspiring. After a meeting, Yurai and I met, and took a walk by the river before heading home together.
Cool dreams, again involving resolution with someone no longer in my life, ditching class to search for magical trees, which I didn’t find, but did pass by a young girl with glowing eyes. Upon returning to class, I overheard a teacher talking about my fairytale, Piyar & Soleil, and it’s author, in such a lovely way. When she spotted me, she urged me to come over and speak to her students… A nice feeling. 🙂
The transitions continues, and my energy is increasing. Feeling good overall.
-Sleep was restless, after going to bed for the second time.
-Awoke in not such a great mood, did some energy work immediately, and let it go.
-Breath doesn’t stink as much (hallelujah!)
-Noticed a couple of pimples around the circumference of my heart chakra – a good thing – toxins are coming out, but if I don’t want pimples, more water today, and salt.
-Hungry? Not so much. Tomorrow marks 2 weeks, and I’d told myself that at the end of every seven days, I’d decide if I would carry on for another seven- yep. 🙂
I love food. Period.
Becoming a regular thing to be physically tired, but mentally alert, upon going to bed. This time my eyes popped open and I got out of bed after midnight, having slept two hours and went online.
I was on pinterest (food, of course), and with the ideas sprinkling over me, came up with four new recipes, which I’m so looking forward to.
Though I do enjoy meat, I find myself leaning more towards veggies, legumes, cheeses, sprouts etc. Feels like it’s the thing for me to do when I do commence eating.
This is a far cry from my paleo days and ways a few years back where I’d awake at 4:30am to eat some form of meat before leading bootcamp at 6:45am, followed by more meat, and another bootcamp at 9:30am – followed by yet more meat, as quick as possible. As one old friend put it, I was a slave to food.
This whole process has allowed me to further strip away all the rules, and be ever more free to choose on a moments whim what and if I wish to ingest.
Later in day- Experiencing some cramping, with my oncoming period, and just feeling blah, so went outside for a walk. I was so tired though, and ended up taking a u-turn, to sit in a playground, basking in the sun.
Was there for a while, feeling, glum at first, and then I started to write. Eventually, I was scribbling down food ideas. Wait for it….
I went home feeling well, and having massaged my around my belly whilst outdoors, to ease the pain and I allow my period to come, it did, as soon as I got in – great – but the pain was back after a short while, and my mood dropped. I was feeling quite awful, questioning my life, feeling quite crappy – the whole nine yards – and decided I didn’t even want to do EFT.
“Feel it all, feel whatever this is, and let it be,” I said to myself, tears and all. I fell asleep, and felt better for it.
Spending a great deal of time on Pinterest and food blogs, for what I can only call, research. Though I am incredibly hungry I think it’s a metaphor for my life:
HUNGRY FOR CHANGE.
-Two weeks done!! As I mentioned somewhere, I’m carrying on another week.
-Awoke later than usual and very tired.
-Period is heavier today.
-Out in the sun today, back in the playground, this time ready for writing. Did much over two hours. Very pleased.
Took afternoon nap, dreamt of two things, food and taking pictures, not of food, but just taking pictures. Dreaming of photography, not for the first time.
Double whammy with the period. So very tired
Small bowel movement in the morning.
Upon morning meditation, I started to gain some clarity. I sat there in the warm sun, contemplating what I’m doing, and have done. Really, all I think about is food, second to which comes designing clothes, but I don’t dream about EFT, it’s something that I just do, for my peace, (and with/for Yurai).
I get it. If someone wants to change themselves, they’ll find a way. Why am I going blue in the face, not to mention, seriously broke, “trying” to help others? Just be.
When I cook, I feed my soul, whether it’s a meal for Yurai and I, or his family, or friends. It’s always magical, because for me it is love, being ‘in the state of love.‘
I’ve been asked to cook for others and refused, just like when I was designing over a decade ago.
I kept refusing because I was scared, despite constant requests.
No one is knocking down my door to learn how to self-heal via EFT.
Yesterday I tweeted (before my mood had dropped):
“Incredible- day 13 of body mind cleanse w/ water & odd coffee, & no desire to eat. HOWEVER, I really want to create, play w/ food & cook! :).”
And in a following tweet:
“Anyone want to loan me their kitchen so I can play and make you some seriously beautiful food…? Mind is rolling with ideas.”
Clarity. Clarity by removing all distractions from my life, and feeding myself with love through water.
Been going over some of my food pics and writing down the recipes, not for a book, but for a blog. I know, I’ve been all talk and no action, because I’ve been trying so hard at something which isn’t going anywhere.
Whist out in the sun again, the name and intro to my food blog spilled out of my mind, onto the pages ahead. A very refreshing feeling.
|Roasted red peppers used for spread.
-Went to bed late last night and awoke early, fresh. With my period easing, I sense my energy is increasing, much like last time I did the cleanse, sleeping only a few hours and full of creativity.
-Sleep was peaceful
-Am very much looking forward to gardening with Yurai’s mom, and starting the cooking today for tomorrow’s lunch (in honor of Yurai’s name day 😉 ).
-Food ideas are coming to me non-stop, the path is clear.
-Sat and chatted with Yurai’s mother, who’s an absolute sweetheart, in Slovak. See below.
What a day! I did no gardening whatsoever. We shopped for everything with Yurai’s mother (she’s over the moon that she no longer has to cook for family events, and I’m more than happy to have taken over :)), but I was extremely exhausted.
Got back home, had a coffee, sat down for a few mins, and then nearly jumped out of my skin to get started with food.
I prepped a light dinner for Yurai and his parents, which was just fresh bread with a couple of spreads, topped with alfalfa sprouts (will put up on the upcoming food blog for you), and then the festivities began for the following day.
|Herbed, pan-fried bread, with delectable spreads.
I made chocolate ice cream, and most of the raw chocolate cake, prepared brioche (my first time making bread!!!!), and with sleep a distant idea, even cut up the onions for another first – french onion soup. I’d have started to make it, though Yurai’s mom called it a night for us all.
On a side note- I must say, she and I sat and chatted for quite a while, in Slovak. Only last week was I saying to Yurai that I’m happy with my level of Slovak and don’t have a desire to learn more, but I was picking up and remembering so much. I really attribute my enhanced learning to this cleanse. By removing old gunk stuck inside of me, I’m left with wide open pathways for newness.
Alas, having been practically ordered to get to bed, (nicely :)), I couldn’t sleep, as I was cooking in my mind. If I didn’t say it before, food is the way. My way.