Going Far Far Away

I’m off again shortly, but before I tell you where, allow me to tell you about my last trip: 

What my mind felt like today- blossoming

15 July, 2015

I woke up brand new, so alive today. Even the air was different, and I felt like I was floating when walking. 

Finally I awoke with a smile and resumed my regular morning activities, unlike the past few days. 

I did my water meditation, went for my usual walk through the vineyards, even had my camera (phone), to take pictures. 

Homemade shampoo, inspired by dear friend
Ashley Binford of Binford’s All Naturals 🙂

I was finally inspired to get back to you, back to social media, but was side tracked in the kitchen – making shampoo, then ended up cleaning the entire flat (like I had my mind), before stopping everything to watch the clouds roll by, and finally heading off to a friends to cook an Indian Feast. 

Indian Feasting with Friends- Veg & Rice 
Lentils & Chicken Curry -my style

The story was quite the opposite only yesterday. Not only did I not want to see anyone, I lacked the motivation for even my own routine stuff. That’s when I decided I was going away, way inside myself- let’s call it ‘going within.’ 

I pretty much got up, sat on the couch, doing the love mantra, as I so often do,  (I love you Munjeet Sehra), though this, whatever I was experiencing was a mega toughie. I hadn’t felt this heaviness in a while, being so ‘off,’ and without reason, or so I thought – the reasons came. 

In going quiet from everyone and everything, I eventually got angry, and then very sad. I fell asleep in my misery and awoke sometime later in the afternoon, not feeling all that much better. 

On an aside, I offer you the details of my life, so as to show you the many shades it has, the many shades of me. 
I am whole, and I am perfect- this does not evade me, ever, (anymore).

The beauty of getting to wear this human body is that we do have emotions, many of them, and our 5+ senses. To be in a body is to actually be in bliss, and walk heaven on earth with all that we’ve been given. 

Solitude reminded me of all that. Solitude reminded me of how eternally lucky I am to be alive. 

Collard Greens & Buckwheat in Chili & Garlic
My version of a ‘dump cake/crumble.’

The anger prolonged after I awoke, and not having made strict rules with myself for my day away, I decided I would eat after all. Getting creative always helps me, so I made something lovely for my tummy – something new, (which I’m adding to my foodblog, when I return from going within), and then got it in my mind to make a mandala. 

The one pictured was based on the head of a poppy. In the centre of the page, I traced out the head, and everything else came to be, from that shape.

A ‘Love Mandala,’

The beauty of nature – Poppy Heads 

The anger eventually dissipated whilst I coloured away, and I understood clearly where it came from and with whom it had to do with. This surprised me much, and told me that what I needed was more love, not less. That the person I was angry towards, had no business of it- it was not their issue at all- just mine. 

I knew that, tough as it was, what I was going through, was for my betterment, that much I trusted absolutely. 

My day pretty much ended with creating and coloring in, the ‘Love Mandala,’ & even though I went to bed very sad, with lots of tears, I awoke as this post began, in the state of love again, at peace, born again to another day. 

Interestingly enough, I’d already started to lessen my time on social media (it’s by no means an issue for me, rather that taking time off from it, like anything, is rejeuvanating- and reminds me why I do what I do). 

During the water meditation this morning, the message was loud and clear: show love, the path of love. 

I may not be a regular blogger, vlogger, or regular anything, but I do listen to the kid in me, who’s my guiding light. That is my pattern, to hear her voice when she’s upset, drop everthing & nurture her. 

So we’ve come to the end of this post, and I don’t end without telling you that I’m doing it again. I’m going away, ‘Going Within,’ – back into the ashram of my mind–  but this time I’m leaving my flat and going to Yurai’s (my husband’s), place – where there is bare minimum, and absolutely no distractions. 

I’m curious how I’ll fare, with absolutely nothing. No writing, no cooking, (I’m choosing to fast, and will drink water only), no designing, no creativity, no computer, no phone. 

Nothing but me, myself and I, and all the things that come up, that I’m stuffing away, not wanting to deal with. 

Yurai did it last week for three days, which he did a vlog about (in Slovak)

Going offline shortly. See you on the other side. 🌞

Much love & peace to you. 


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